The Sixth Estate
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Merry Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Ramadan, and/or Festivus!

Doubt thou the stars are fire;
Doubt that the sun doth move;
Doubt truth to be a liar;
But never doubt I love.

Phew... Exams are over, thank goodness. Christmas break is upon us, and it is a good thing. Aside from having a cold, which I seem to get every year around this time, I have no complaints. I got a good haul of gifts for Christmas, and I gave a lot of gifts that were well received... Except for the book I got my Dad which he had already read. DOH! And the food hasn't been too bad either. Christmas dinner at the grandparents condo was awesome!

I like having time off from school. Weekday morning television; a phenomenon which I have been unaware of for the past several years, because I've either been at school or been soundly asleep, is pretty entertaining. The other day I watched 2 episodes of Maury Povich in a row! Jealous?!

On the topic of Maury Povich, it seems that he only has one topic for his show these days: Paternity Tests!

"My next guest has been on the show 9 times, and tested 20 different men, none of whom turned out to be the father."

Of course the poor woman comes on the show to test yet another man and the answer is always the same
"*INSERT NAME HERE*, You are NOT the father!"

Truly, very sad. But it's not like some of these women didn't have it coming. If you were so promiscuous that out of the 20 men you think you slept with in a few week period, none of them turn out to be the father... You really shouldn't have kids.

On the subject of illegitimate children and Christmas, presents :
More Than You Ever Wanted To Know About The Atrocity That Was THE STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL!

Chewbacca's horrifying father Lumpy.

Han Solo looks like he desperately wants to be elsewhere, Luke Skywalker looks like a teenage girl and Princess Leia sings at the end of the much maligned (and with good reason) holiday special. The first 15 minutes feature nothing but dialogue in Wookie between members of Chewbacca's family, and to make matters worse Bea Arthur shows up! BEA ARTHUR! Even the first appearance of everybody's favourite bounty hunter Boba Fett couldn't save this train wreck. I would say it's almost worth it just to say you've seen it... But there are some things you just can't UN-SEE! Read the article at I-Mockery and thank Buddha you don't have to watch it. Check it out here.

Back and to the right...

And on the subject of Star Wars... Someone put far too much time, thought and effort into this Greedo Assassination Theory website. Did Greedo shoot first or was Han just that damn good?

New Favourite Movie

The Third Man
is an amazing 1949 film. Directed by Carol Reed and starring Orson Welles, the movie is a classic example of Film Noir. Set in post-war Vienna, the film finds American pulp writer Holly Martins(Joseph Cotten) fresh off the train looking for his friend Harry Lime, who has offered him a job. Martins soon discovers that his friend was recently killed in a mysterious car accident, and sets out to discover what really happened to his friend. In the end Martins discovers more than he ever wanted or should have known.

The Third Man is really just a top notch film, I can't recommend it enough.

I also decided to have a little fun in photoshop after watching this movie.

Photoshop Skills + Film Geekness + Borderline Narcissism = This picture.

Hey, you can't blame a guy for wishing he was in a classic film noir movie.
Photoshop is a hell of a tool, but I'm still no Orson Welles.

Stalin's Half-man, Half-ape Super-warriors

Soviet dictator Josef Stalin ordered the creation of Planet of the Apes-style warriors by crossing humans with apes, according to recently uncovered secret documents.

Moscow archives show that in the mid-1920s Russia's top animal breeding scientist, Ilya Ivanov, was ordered to turn his skills from horse and animal work to the quest for a super-warrior.

I'm really not surprised about anything concerning the former USSR that I hear coming out of Russia these days... Oh those crazy Commies, gotta love 'em.
Read the full article here.

Now I want a half-man, half-ape super warrior! Stupid ethics.

Crazy cool music video.

The artist, Jason Forrest has a very unique sound. Don't really know what genre it would be considered. I've never heard this guy before, but the music video is very cool. Basically, it's a bunch of animated Vikings having a musical battle with Furry Monster types involving ships and giant robots. Words really cannot do it justice, so check it out the video for War Photographer.

The Ultimate Showdown

This is an incredible flash movie detailing a battle of epic proportions. Pitting Optimus Prime, Batman, Godzilla, The Power Rangers, Darth Vader, Gandalf, Captain Kirk, Mister Rogers, Chuck Norris and many, many more against one another in a battle for ultimate power. Awesome!

Check out The Ultimate Showdown!

Good tidings to you and your kin.

- Will



By Anonymous Anonymous, at Saturday, 22 July, 2006  

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